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Here's something you can count on as sure as the sun rising in the morning -
If you're going to do hard things, there is going to be doubt.
Doubt -- the whispered thoughts in our own minds that causes us to feel uncertain about what we're doing.
Doubt -- a skepticism or questioning of our efforts and/or our intent.
Doubt -- an uncertainty that we will actually be able to do what we want to do.
I've found that when it comes to goal work, doubt exists to keep us in our Comfort Cave, that mythical place inside us where nothing -- including us -- ever changes.
Learning how to manage your doubt is often the difference between success and stopping and I've seen far too many dreams die because of doubt.
Because we think that all the thoughts in our minds, including the doubt thoughts, are telling us something that's true. But are they?
Here are three questions you can ask a doubt thought to determine if it is indeed the truth and should be followed or if it's one that you can reject.
#1: Is it true?
Here’s something I learned that changed everything for me: Thoughts are not always facts. Thoughts are sentences (sometimes with some emotion added in) that run through our heads. That’s it. They can be true (such as ‘Every day ends with the letter ‘y’), but they aren’t always true (such as Monday is the best day of the week).
Don’t make the mistake of believing that every thought that comes from your own mind is the truth. It’s not.
To be considered the truth, a thought must be verifiable (100% of people would agree with you), objective (not based on emotions), and consistent (applies across different situations). If it doesn’t pass this verification test, it’s not a fact. If it's not a fact, you don't have to believe it.
#2: Is it helpful?
Does this thought support the direction you are trying to head? Or is it trying to stop you from growing and goal-getting?
Hearing “You’re a bad writer” or "No one will ever read this" when you are trying to write a book is certainly not helpful.
Noticing doubt thoughts in your mind that directly contradict the direction you are trying to go is a good clue that they are being sent as a form of protection from your primal brain. Remember, your primal brain's main objective is to keep you safe, alive, and lazy and tucked into your Comfort Cave.
#3: What else could be true?
This question is my favorite because it deliberately leads me to consider other options to what the doubt is telling me.
So when your doubt whispers to you "You're doing it wrong," you can recognize other options: (1) There are many ways to do this; (2) The only way to know if this is the wrong way is to try; or maybe even (3) Right or wrong is not the goal, doing it is.
Asking yourself these three questions will help you disprove your doubt. Once you disprove it, you can get back to doing your hard thing and becoming a goal-getter.
Want more tips to fly to help you become a goal-GETTER? Listen to The Flight School Podcast here.
Jen Laffin helps 6-figure service-based solopreneurs navigate the Messy Middle of their goal journey. She's a master teacher and host of The Flight School Podcast. Follow along to go from being a goal-SETTER to a goal-GETTER. To learn more, visit www.jenlaffin.com, or find Jen on Linkedin.
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